Because terrorists are known for their toiletries

I’ve only just regained my ability to be civil regarding the entire airline industry after returning from Maryland on Friday (sorry Killer Boob). You’d think I hadn’t flown in eons… but really, I just went to Mexico last October. That’s a whole other country, folks. They don’t even speak our language or anything. And I had to get a passport. And yet, I still managed to make it all the way there and back (thank you very much) with out so much as one confiscated toiletry item. But some how, I could not even make it out of our teeny, tiny little airport without my poor bags being manhandled by the security personnel.

In the airline’s defense, I did have a moment of blatant disregard for the rules and threw the entire tube of my Crest Whitening Expressions Vanilla Mint toothpaste into my carry on. I can’t help it. I love the stuff. I just wasn’t thinking. Same with my Mary K face cleanser. Just didn’t think about it being over 4 oz. However, I did spend the time to go shopping for those handy-dandy little empty travel containers for shampoo & such just so I could bring my other toiletries. The airline website clearly stated “Travel size liquids, aerosols and gels are allowed in carry-on baggage if they are in containers that are 3.4 oz (100ml) or smaller.” Well, nowhere in the greater central coast could I find travel containers less than 4 oz in size. So, I filled them half full. Which, got them all thrown away by the friendly flight security folks.

The shampoo is no big deal. But my contact solution and saline for sensitive eyes is hard to find. I showed the Nazi-ette that the bottles were clearly only half filled so as to be under 3.4 oz. Apparently it’s the size of the container not the amount in them that matters. She had the nerve to tell me I should have packed it in my suitcase. Like I’m going to trust them not to lose my luggage. Humph.

So, when I got to Mama C’s house I found that my well-packed (expensive) hair mousse had been broken in my suitcase. Thankfully, just the nozzle snapped off and was still usable – and a bit annoying.

Fast forward to my return flight when I checked my carry-on. Once I got home I discovered a varied assortment of toiletry carnage. The previously maimed mousse was fatally wounded – cap and nozzle ring crushed. My Big Sexy Hairspray for my small hoping-to-be-sexy hair is also capless from here on out. I have a tray of daily pill organizers that were shattered. All my meds were free-floating in my luggage. All my make up in my Kaboodle was completely pulverized. I’m not talking about blusher being broken into a few chunks here… I’m talking about turning my make up case into an urn… the final resting place for too many dollars worth of Mary K blush, eye shadow, pressed powder and loose powder (now looser still).

Maybe I’ll ship ahead next time.

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